toadcult

Deicide for dummies:

1: I FUCKING HATE JESUS LOTS
2: Slayer MkII, only LOUDER
3: Repeat over and over without progression

I have mellowed out and, as a result, really dont need an online journal or documentation item. Yes I still use the net, but more as a lurking element while I browse stuff I feel I need to look at rather then floating in trivia and being bemused by forums and people's oddity.
I should theoretically delete this thing then, but whenever I do I seem to need to fall back onto something or feel the need to start it up again. So here is SCUM journal, dorment but not dead.

And how is my reality? I am level 3 Japanese again despite only starting up again in May time. I've crammed more or less 3 years of learining into 4 months.
The Aim? Hiroshima, and beyond that is simple dreams caught in the mind not putting to concrete untill I know I am headed somewhere.

The phone rings

“Liam, I’m dead.” I know this person “I shot myself in the head.”

I hang up the phone, they have commit suicide. There is a web page up on the computer, their MySpace or something. It has been compiled with death and its essence. Not in its wording or imagery, in these dreams there are no words, but the very essence of death itself lingering out with its aura and crushing all near it.
I pull the internet in its entirety from the wall looking for truth in what happened. Its reality becomes dust before me.

I am unmoved, for I am made of stone.
I don’t exist.

“I DONT LOVE YOU! I DONT LOVE ANYBODY!”
Said Dougle as he lost his temper at the fact the store had sold out of Crisps.

Shopping is far more volatile than it needs to be. Every time I enter a supermarket to get foodstuffs there tends to be a war going on, a WAR against prices, but not in the store from the staff, but from the customers grumbling and complaining. The fact that people at tills don’t load shopping bags, the fact the bags are not for free, the fact they don’t like the blonde colour of the assistant’s hair. When a refund is not issued immediately the shopper is entitled to stand obstinately and block all other customers’ paths, nothing permitted to pass through the till until they have had their refund, letter of apology, free complimentary brick and a ton of store vouchers to cut the price of their shopping in two.
This is a bitter rant from a bitter man who is bitter at the bitter being bitter for the sake of taking advantage of situations. In the many opportunities I get in one day to take advantage of a situation to another’s detriment I rarely do. Is this because I am weak? Potentially, or it could be I see myself as an element of a society where if I do said things I contribute to its unravelling. Then again, saving a few pence is a good enough reason to unravel society for my own personal dog-eat-dog gains. I mean look at Zimbabwe and how well that’s doing with the powers that be viewing things as such.

Ranting and whining on the net; I am part of the disease.
I should join ANUS.com, I'd be very good at that.

I need a new SATA disk to install Ubuntu

Most people at work have Swine flu, lets see when I get it.

Maybe its a bit heavy on the "OH THIS MAN IS DYING IN MY ARMS!" but I dont think I've seen a more beautifully costructed war film. Annoying how this was pushed onto the sidelines due to its release at the same time as Saving Private Ryan.

Nightbringer - Death and the Black Work



Once and a while a band makes an album of such perfectionism in a genre it shines with such strength and power most basking in its illumination sub coming to its splendid grandeur and omnipotent genius. The wise however look beyond the initial terrible beauty and awe, staring to its very core essence and stripping it down to the bare basics. Once there they simply think "So what?" and leave a little disgruntled by the shock and awe hiding little more than a nice act covering over the lack of substance.
This is Nightbringer's Debut LP; an album of awesome power and supreme black metal mastering but little in burning energy, variation or art. It is no doubt the most masterful thing I have heard this year in the hairy leather nun underground of face painted loonies along with Katharsis' Forth Reich and its utter perfectionist attempt at creating the blackest of the black is certainly worthy of praise, but even a single listen opens its greatest problems.
Technically speaking Nightbringer are tight, they compose songs well and have quite a nice signature style of tremolo picking in their riffs. If either (or both) of the prior split LP releases have been heard before you will possibly know its Nightbringer within the first minute of the opening track once the guitars kick in due to the method they use. Think Dark Funeral played without the cheese, Burzum's Ea, lord of the Depths or Ondskapt but with further emphasis on single notes and long holds in single keys. It does paint a very effective atmosphere and in the times Nightbringer slow themselves down the riffs hang in the air creating huge nightmarish atmospheres, painting dark woods, cold empty castles and other such romantic claptrap. The delivery seems to be almost perfect in both the tight playing and correctly balanced production, guitars never apparently slipping and drumming so insanely precise it makes you wonder if it is triggered, if so it sounds very natural, if not the drummer has an incredible sense of subtlety of very slight variations in blast speed (Snare work in places has to be heard to be believed). Long compositions that hang themselves out leaving little filler in their wake shows the skills of these guys, most tracks being over 10 minutes in length or so.
At this point a small crack of light shows through the curtains, the strings begin to show and it becomes apparent this is a puppet show. The curious pull the curtains to the side a slight and find all the problems hiding backstage, hoping others won’t see through to them. The perfectionism that grants Nightbringer their power is one of their downfalls; where is the spark? The Burning energy that made De Mysteriis what it was and drives modern contempary acts like Katharsis such silly nostalgia agents? It lacks it in favour of the dark atmosphere the riffs conjure, and while it has its niche it sits alongside far too many American acts in its utter lack of (GASP) excitement. If this was a unique thing, the album would contain more character, but then again it reeks of NO FUN NO TREND NO MOSH NO CORE despite most members were possibly watching Thundercats while Norwegians were burning stuff and putting knives in people (I know I was!).
With all this huge gargantuan epicenes of... epic the album also drags a little. I CANNOT advise this on CD as I think I'd go mad trying to listen to the whole 70+ minutes of music. While other bands such as Xasthur have managed this, Scott had a good degree of verity thrown into the Nocturnal Poisoning album, this is in comparison monotone and flat; 100 minutes of the same riff styles with the same panning drums constantly going on and on. While there are a couple of keyboard breaks they seem to be placed with older, reworked tracks and therefore familiar (though in fairness the reworking are fantastically done), no shocks, no challenges and no balance.
For all its worth this is a fantastic LP and one by a band who have a very good idea of what they are doing, they just need to work on the balance of material and the overwhelming quantity of it. It’s all quality, but they need a lesson from Akira Kurosawa: even if the whole work is fantastic, be objectionable and cut things maliciously even at the expense of ego.

これは私のうちです。
ここも私の刑務所です。
私は古いです。死だや腐食が見ました。
二十七さいは古いくない、でも頭が元気じゃない。

でもきぶ（？）はあります。

僕はリアームです。ありがとうございます。

Nightbringer / Serpentinam



I avoided Nightbringer for a couple of years as I have a vague memory of someone I fell out with being in them (or so I think), though with time I have passed off the worthless of who did what and who says what leaving a surprisingly adept band launch their audio at me.
Despite all the ocultywulty Crimson Mooneyness that people seem to surround this band with the audio creeps out painting its own images. "Occult" does seem befitting a description primarily through the serpentine riffs dancing and weaving themselves into and out of the rhythm section. It’s not something that new and it’s been done by a number of bands trying to make themselves sound as evil and vampiric as possible, however Nightbringer seem to interlace them and evolve them binding the drums and vocals into a tight whole. Like Katharsis (though with an almost infinite less fury) the material seems very heavily refined, both songs on the split refined to create as great an atmosphere as possible. The victory comes in the fact the audio borders on becoming a cheesy self mockery of itself, yet rides the fine edge between meticulous Black Metal and prats in LA pretending to be Vampires and succeeds in painting its pitch-black atmospherics.
Despite this praise the split feels incomplete somehow. It’s both too short and for the huge atmosphere it creates it starts rather haphazardly, jumping straight into the fray with the blasting madness. Normally I would be fine with this, but for something that creates as epic a scope as this, a build up from an introduction of some form would have been better. A sign of potentially better things to come, though I have said that about a number of US based bands in the early half of this decade.

Serpentinam are USBM; they are badly produced, oddly mixed, have jarring vocals for the subtle audio they use and have a horridly synthetic and overloud drum machine. This could be the greatest band on earth, however I don’t care due to the fact the mix sounds like the whole thing was made by a 14 year old in his bedroom. Apparently half of Nightbringer are in this band and with that I can guess that is why this is placed on the B side. Either they need to figure out how to mix stuff or they should stick to MySpace / blog demos as this REALLY does not belong on vinyl.

Occultism is not an academic subject. External to the self it is nothing more then a gimick.

七人の侍：このえいがはどこですか？おもしろいえいが、でも捜すためはむずかしですよ！
アキラクロサワ（感じわかりません）はすごいでした。

うんこんが痛い！

Xasthur - All Reflections Drained



Now the fact I am not only reviewing a Xasthur Album, never mind actually touching a physical copy means something. This is not me promoting myself as someone of importance; it is simply because over the past decade no band has left me as frustrated as this project. Nocturnal Poisoning had a fantastic potential to it. It almost seemed to be a signal of far more interesting things to come, however with each successive release (of which there were far too many far too quickly) by mid 2004 Xastur seemed like some kind of backwards joke that only Scott who ran the band seemed to get. The music went no-where, there was no apparent will to expand and there was little differentiation between releases. Cover songs and repeats of older tracks and pointless remixed re-issues of albums further diluted the potential Nocturnal Poisoning had. I think I've listened to all the material that has been publically released, but post 2004 only on MP3, and once listened to deleted due to its apathetic will.

All Reflections Drained is still the same moppey, depressed and noticeably Xasthur that it’s ever been the (at times) same turgid mildly annoying drone, the lack of speed, and the focus on the morbid. In this is the main criticism: it’s a Xasthur album. If you did not like the preceding material this indeed delivers very little in substance. It’s certainly more open in its atmosphere then the stuff of the past 5 years, however as mentioned, people who need more teeth tearing them audio-wise, this is a pointless recording.
IF however you are willing to give the band a try then this record is arguably the strongest release since the Funeral of Being. The key to ol Scotty's sound has always been the way he could paint drab atmospheres well. Whereas the older records sounded as if he did them at his bedside into a 4 track, this actually seems like it’s been recorded with thought put into it. Its certainly not truly professional sounding, where the atmosphere seems to be more dusty, humid and very musty, like it were recorded in an old wooden shack coated in cobwebs and lumps of decaying wood. I can practically smell this!
Another boon is the actual real drums, the sloppiness, the dullness of them with the musty production opens the sound up a great deal as opposed to the basic (though reasonably well thought out) old electronic programming. Although I imagine the record is smothered in production techniques, the drums sound natural rather than a forced and lazy reverbed mess. The large hiss from the splash symbol also adds to the mood, creating a wall of noise that the older album's guitars used to make.
While on the guitars the strongest element comes forth; composition, placement of tracks and general pacing. Side A of the record shines in the fact that each track seems to develop in mood and pace at odds with all that may come prior or post itself. No two tracks are easily mistaken, where Dirge Forsaken, Achieve Emptiness ptII (fantastic bass sound) and Masquerade of Incisions flow fantastically from each other. The last track is possibly one of the outright strongest compositions the band has ever put forth. Side B flops a slight but retains enough energy to keep its momentum. It sags a slight, but this has always been the problem Xasthur has had.

To cut the long story short this is indeed the first Xasthur album of real note since Nocturnal Poisoning. It’s finally some progression from a band who has rested on their laurels for far too long, and in that it may well be too late. I know a good deal of folks have rejected them for the fact ol Scotty boy is a big smelly twat and a lord of most of the wrong things in USBM (the king being Nachtmysticals) and the band have done little of worth in the vast back catalogue of items. If these facts can be overlooked (many wont) and if you did actually enjoy Nocturnal Poisoning, and that’s actually genuinely enjoyed it as opposed to being caught up in the hype around it, then All Reflections Drained may well be worth a shot.
NOTE: Try and download it first. For whatever reason the label that released it decided to include a whole pile of worthless shit alongside it. I own the cassette version, and even then they decided to include 3 pins (!) and a cloth patch with it, and none of said items I ever intend to use. I suspect the CD and LP versions have as much wasted material with them as well.

私は夢です。
私の夢でわない、夢は私です。
人間は．．．
疲れた．．．わすれました。

妄想代理人はおもしろいでした。いいアニメです。

The polar icecaps are melting and the summer is getting hotter and more rank in its humidity...

BUT SHIT PETER ANDRE AND JORDAN HAVE SPLIT UP!!!
el oh el oh el

It is said that the devil grew tired and rested upon the spire of the church in Chesterfield, bending it into the twisted form that it is now.
The more time passes the more I long to see my old home county of Derbyshire. I moved to Nottingham City as it was far more convenient for living, mainly because I needed to escape my family and become independent. Now I have got over my own form of self worthlessness I long to see the old countryside in years gone past.
I need to learn how to drive.

Last night I had a dream that I remember:

Xasthur were playing live in the UK so I thought 'Why not?' and went to see the gig. The concert was held in a school gym in a castle on this really big hill. Rather then play on a stage everyone sat on the floor round the centre of the room where there was a big PA with the music comming out of it while Xasthur sat in a cupord at the side playing the music. People kept comming up to him and slapping him with their cocks or ramming their penises in his ear, to which he mainly replied with "Oh you japesters!" and continued playing. I then noticed he was only playing covers (THIS IS A VERY REALISTIC DREAM!) and pulled out some old Norwegian LP and noticed it was some song about a big Skooge, vintergrandmyrksskooge or something silly. I thought "fuck this!" and left as I owned all the LPs anyhow and most of the people were there as they seemed to be bidding on ebay to get all the Xasthur LPs.
I then went to London which looked like the Vatican City (which London always seems to be in my dreams) and had to teach a gorilla Karate. Mid way through this I had a change of heart and thought "Oh shit I'm missing Xasthur live!" I ran back but ended up being blocked in some Yorkshire town by loads of old woman from meals on wheels in their cars, all of them were smoking. I eventually got up the giant hill with the castle and when I got to the gym I'd missed Xasthur and Neil Dimond was playing. I looked around and noticed one of the walls had caved in and killed half the crowd. I walked up to Neil and said "Look half the crowd are dead! What happened?" he just laughed and made some song about it. I left in disgust.

I cant remember the remainder of the dream.

When you are working and some girls comment "He's kinda cute, weird cute"(loose translation, hard to put it in English) in Japanese, then for you, after serving them, they slip with "どうも．．．Sorry, thankyou" and you finish with "どういたしまして" and a smile... its a memory to cherish watching them going bright red and bumbling out of the store with their slightly shocked and giggling friends.

Right now, I feel like a smelly, skinney (but growing STRONGER, I need a Manowar montage) god. I sit naked and I say HAIL to all things. Its been almost 2 months since I drank last and I dont intend to start again. Once you get over the initial boredom of being sober, its blooming brilliant.

Gravewürm - Ancient Storms of War



I am quite tolerant of music these days and even give certain records I dismiss at first a second chance picking up pieces I may have missed; then again with this record it’s a little different.
OH COME ON! This is utter crap! It’s so bad it has charm, but it’s a charm that I do not warm to. It sounds like some retarded demo I'd throw away because of how silly it is, but the fact this shit got pressed to an LP?
?!?!?!?!??!?!???!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!??!??!?!??!?!?!?????!?!??!??!
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH SOME PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AGH!!!! This makes me want to become a Xasthur fan so I can kill myself after killing my friends and their cats and make an excuse that it was Xasthur and these guys who made me do it.
I want to be fisted by a gorilla! Fuck!

Its foolish to pretend politics have no effect over any individual in a nation. No matter your subculture, belifs, sexual orientation or whatnot you will be pulled by the unseen strings that opperate from above. You need not take part in the pulling of the strings, but you must at least prepare for what the hands decide for you.

UK politics are a bit screwy right now with things tilting back towards the Conservatives to "Clean up Labor's mess once again." and with the current fumbling of Gorden Brown I'll agree, but only to a certian degree. If people deny that the standard of British living has not improved over the past twelve years then they have either screwed up for themselves or they had the silver spoon plucked from the mouth and are bitter that more are indeed better off in general. I remember the early New Labor years as well, cause I was stuck in the stinking drug-ailed fuckhole that the UK was. Yes it still is a drug-ailed fuckhole in large cities, but its not as dispair filled as the past, there is a resession going on, but while I'm cutting back on stuff there are not riots like in the past and I dont think skagheads are on the rampant mugging sprees as they were in the past... just the focus of violence seems to have shifted to the islamic nutballs of late.
But yes of late Labor have been a mess, as in late 80s Conservative sleeze mess but to a more radical degree. The scandles relating to tax money being used by MPs for personal plesure and outright embezzlement in some cases have been bemusing to say the least, amusingly all steming from an MPs husband watching some porn on a hotel's TV service and footing the £200 bill on the taxpaier and things escilating from there (score one for the gutterpress in terms of political change). Half of the Goverment is being stoic screaming "I have done no wrong! I am inside the law!" and indeed they are, but they seem to neglect the fact that Embezzeling £15000 of taxmoney on fraudulent morgages (which has some law loophole) does not sit too well with the general public's view of them. Mix this with the fact Gordon Brown has came to power with the stagnation of the Economy (which he by and large built as the Chanceler prior to his Priminister possition) and his apparant bumbling with stealth tax and bizzare ideas like "Lets all spend ourselves out of this resesion with credit we dont own."... I god damn wish I was joking on the last item.
Yep, Labor have run out of steam and, as per usual every decade or so, its time to switch to the obvious opposition, the Concervatives (i.e. Labor with slightly altered ideas and their badges are blue). Some see this as a major change, and it is in ways, but this is exactly how it has been from the mid 1960s onwards. One party taking power and then eventually running out of steam only to errupt into a huge ball of scandle and sleeze. Labor and their followers blame the conservatives for the privitisation of the nation in the 80s and the ressesion mixed with mass poverty, as the conservatives blame Labor for starting it with the winter of discontent in the 70s and people loosing their jobs left right and centre. Truth be told this toing-and-froing has been going on largely post World War II with the knockon weakened state of the nation and the collapse of the old British empire. No matter if people like it or not, an island nation that tended to send soldiers out and reap the recorces of others now reels as it burdens itself with the people of the former collonies comming in and the recorces strained as most localy scorced items have dropped in value. The mass immigration from India and locals plus the West Indies (primarily Jamaica) has put a great degree of strain on the local cultures and populace build, and thats a fact if people like it or not. The country is still reeling in ways and has enjoyed a very prosperous and libral decade and thats bloody great. However, a small shift to the right (to kerb the insane mess caused by certian disgruntled immigrents for example) may be needed. I'm not promoting Camaron's Conservative party for the moment as by and large his ploy has been "Look at the American dude! They have a nigger for president LOL! Lets change like them, we need CHANGE!" but if you ask a change to what, its simply "A change from the current Labor shithole!" Thats all well and good, but I can certianly see where it can change from, anyone can, just I wonder what they propose to change too as they seem very light on the ground about that. By and large they just whinge like old men about "This is not working well, the NHS is on fire and children are exploding in the street as they have KNIVES! and we want less taxes and more public services!" despite this most things seem fine, just a little wobbley in some ways. I'd like to see them cut taxes and improve public services and construction better then this past goverment however, as if anyone points at that I laugh.

Anyhow, I am tired, I must sleep, and I am POLITICSAMANGATO!!! and shit

今で僕は疲れた。
寝ます。